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.And you know that, too.”Did Jason know that?Chase pointed at him.“And it’s not just words.I mean, yeah, there’s some words you’ll need to say, but I know Sue.” He thumped Jason’s back.“She’s not expecting you to be Romeo.I think she just wants to know that you really want this.”“I do want this,” Jason said.“Go to her.Buy some flowers,” Chase suggested.“Do some soul-searching and ask yourself what she really wants.If it’s to name the cat, name the freaking cat.And tell her…tell her what you just told me.Tell her you’re scared.” A smile pulled at Chase’s mouth.“Women love to know men are scared.It’s a power trip for them.”“A power trip,” Jason repeated.Right then he realized he’d given Sue the power to hurt him by loving her.This was what he’d wanted to avoid.What he’d been avoiding all his life.But for the life of him, he wasn’t sorry.He wasn’t sorry that he loved her.He met Chase’s gaze again, suddenly hopeful.“What else do I tell her?”“The truth,” Chase said.“And stop pretending that you don’t care.”Jason let out a breath.“What if she turns me down again?”“What if she doesn’t?”Chase started out of the office.He hadn’t gotten past the door when he swung back around.“Oh, yeah.And if you really want to win Sue over, you’ll have to stop kissing her ex-husband.” Jason raised his eyes and stared.Chase held his gut and laughed.“Yeah, Sue told Lacy about that.”Jason snatched the day-old jelly donut off his desk and slung it at the door.Chase ducked, but the donut hit another mark.There, behind Chase, stood the purple-haired old woman, AKA the Cucumber Lady, with helmet hair.“Men!” she growled and eyed the jelly-filled donut glued to her chest.“Pains in the rear, every one of them!”“I’m…sorry.” Jason had to bite back a laugh when he saw the laughter in Chase’s eyes.She pointed her finger at Jason.“That high and mighty limo service you recommended didn’t show up again.”CHAPTER THIRTY-SIXSue parked in front of Maggie’s and placed a hand over her nervous stomach.Dressed in her pink suit, makeup perfect, she was ready for her signing and ready to face Jason’s mom.Or at least she was pretending she was ready.After her father died, Sue had learned that pretending to be stronger was the first step to actually being stronger.Until she got over Jason, she was pretending she wasn’t dying inside.When Maggie called this morning and mentioned Sue had forgotten to sign her books, Sue had offered to stop by before her actual autographing.Maggie had sounded so delighted that when the reality of what she’d agreed to do set in, Sue hadn’t had the heart to cancel.So here she was, at Maggie’s house, about to go inside and pretend that everything was hunky dory when in reality there was nothing hunky or dory.Squaring her shoulders, she stepped up to the porch.Maggie opened the door wearing a smile and a yellow dress the same color as her kitchen.The woman hugged Sue and then drew her out to the back of the bed and breakfast to her private residence.“Come, sit down and have tea.Or do you have time for tea? I could make it really fast.I have orange or lemon snap.The books are in here.” She led Sue into the living room.“I have cookies, too.”Sue forced herself to smile.“I have time for a quick cup.Thank you.I’ll take what ever tea is your favorite.”“Good.” Maggie walked into the kitchen, and Sue looked around the room, her gaze drawn to all the photos.A knot tightened her throat as she looked at one snapshot of a young Jason mowing the lawn.As Sue’s finger passed over the image, her heart clenched.“Is my boy behaving?” Maggie set two cups on the coffee table.A spicy lemon scent wafted up with the steam.Sue folded her arms around herself.“He’s…behaving fine as frog’s hair.”“Frog’s hair?” Maggie looked at her, and Sue decided she really needed to pitch that saying.It always got the same confused response.“He’s been fine,” she clarified, even though it was a big fat lie.Maggie motioned to the photograph Sue was studying.“You want to see my favorite pictures?”As painful as Sue knew it would be, she told the truth: “I’d love to.”Maggie walked to the coffee table.She opened up a Bible and pulled out a thin strip of photographs, the kind that were taken in those tiny curtained booths in shopping malls.Images of giggling girlfriends came to Sue’s mind.When Jason’s mother gazed at the strip of photos, tears filled her eyes.Then she handed them over.Sue looked down and her breath caught.The sheet of photos held a teenage Jason with Maggie.Yet, neither of them was giggling.Black eyes and bruises marred both faces.Maggie’s, however, looked worse.Sue touched fingers to her lips, hoping to stop them from trembling.Looking up, she asked, “What happened?”Maggie blinked away tears.“My husband Ralph.He wasn’t always bad—not good, mind you, but not always bad.However, he drank, and when he drank he was mean.” She folded and unfolded her hands.“He’d been sober for almost three years.Most of our marriage he traveled with his job, and I felt so alone.We hadn’t been able to have kids, and I thought if we took in a child it might help us become a family.”Palming the edge of the sofa, Maggie paused before continuing.“The foster care program asked if we’d come and meet Jason.I wanted a younger child, but the day I met that boy I saw something in him.Loneliness, maybe.” She hesitated again.“I learned he’d been taken from his mother at eight while she went into a drug treatment program.She was supposed to get him back when she got well.But, she changed her mind.”Even though Sue had pretty much heard this, she hurt for Jason all over again.“The caseworkers told me Jason was hard to work with, but…it was as if everyone had given up on him.I had to try.” Maggie sat down on the small melon-colored sofa and motioned for Sue to sit beside her.Sue dropped down beside Maggie, feeling emotions crawl around her chest.Strongest of all was wonder: How could anyone have given up on Jason?“They were right about something,” Maggie continued.“Jason was a trying young man.I set rules.He’d break them.I set curfews, and he’d not make them.And whenever I’d try to talk to him, he’d look as if he expected me to call someone to come get him.” Maggie stared at her hands.“I was tempted a time or two.But I couldn’t do it.” When the older woman finally looked up, Sue saw in her eyes the same emotion that seemed to be bouncing around Sue’s own chest.Sue felt her eyes begin to water.The question she’d just asked herself, Who could give up on Jason? took a lap around her aching heart.Had she not given up on him?Maggie continued, “Once I took in Jason, Ralph practically never came home.Every six weeks he might show up for a few days.I noticed he was drinking again.” She shook her head.“He and Jason hardly even knew each other.And neither of them seemed to want to get to know each other.” Fidgeting with her dress, Maggie went on.“Then, the last time Ralph came home, he…he went crazy.” She pointed to the picture Sue had forgotten she held.“All I remember was Ralph coming at me and hitting me.Over and over again.Then Jason ran in, screaming for Ralph to leave me alone.Ralph turned on him.They fought.It was really bad.Finally, Jason threw Ralph out the front door, tossed him his keys, and told him that if he ever came back, he’d kill him.”Maggie placed a hand over her mouth as if to hold back emotion.For Sue it was too late.Tears rolled down her face, smeared her mascara, and totally ruined her makeup—the makeup she’d applied perfectly for her signing.But she didn’t care.“Jason drove me to the hospital.I told the doctor that I’d fallen, but Jason wouldn’t hear of it, and he told them the truth.The cop that came to the hospital that night, he somehow made an impression on Jason [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
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.And you know that, too.”Did Jason know that?Chase pointed at him.“And it’s not just words.I mean, yeah, there’s some words you’ll need to say, but I know Sue.” He thumped Jason’s back.“She’s not expecting you to be Romeo.I think she just wants to know that you really want this.”“I do want this,” Jason said.“Go to her.Buy some flowers,” Chase suggested.“Do some soul-searching and ask yourself what she really wants.If it’s to name the cat, name the freaking cat.And tell her…tell her what you just told me.Tell her you’re scared.” A smile pulled at Chase’s mouth.“Women love to know men are scared.It’s a power trip for them.”“A power trip,” Jason repeated.Right then he realized he’d given Sue the power to hurt him by loving her.This was what he’d wanted to avoid.What he’d been avoiding all his life.But for the life of him, he wasn’t sorry.He wasn’t sorry that he loved her.He met Chase’s gaze again, suddenly hopeful.“What else do I tell her?”“The truth,” Chase said.“And stop pretending that you don’t care.”Jason let out a breath.“What if she turns me down again?”“What if she doesn’t?”Chase started out of the office.He hadn’t gotten past the door when he swung back around.“Oh, yeah.And if you really want to win Sue over, you’ll have to stop kissing her ex-husband.” Jason raised his eyes and stared.Chase held his gut and laughed.“Yeah, Sue told Lacy about that.”Jason snatched the day-old jelly donut off his desk and slung it at the door.Chase ducked, but the donut hit another mark.There, behind Chase, stood the purple-haired old woman, AKA the Cucumber Lady, with helmet hair.“Men!” she growled and eyed the jelly-filled donut glued to her chest.“Pains in the rear, every one of them!”“I’m…sorry.” Jason had to bite back a laugh when he saw the laughter in Chase’s eyes.She pointed her finger at Jason.“That high and mighty limo service you recommended didn’t show up again.”CHAPTER THIRTY-SIXSue parked in front of Maggie’s and placed a hand over her nervous stomach.Dressed in her pink suit, makeup perfect, she was ready for her signing and ready to face Jason’s mom.Or at least she was pretending she was ready.After her father died, Sue had learned that pretending to be stronger was the first step to actually being stronger.Until she got over Jason, she was pretending she wasn’t dying inside.When Maggie called this morning and mentioned Sue had forgotten to sign her books, Sue had offered to stop by before her actual autographing.Maggie had sounded so delighted that when the reality of what she’d agreed to do set in, Sue hadn’t had the heart to cancel.So here she was, at Maggie’s house, about to go inside and pretend that everything was hunky dory when in reality there was nothing hunky or dory.Squaring her shoulders, she stepped up to the porch.Maggie opened the door wearing a smile and a yellow dress the same color as her kitchen.The woman hugged Sue and then drew her out to the back of the bed and breakfast to her private residence.“Come, sit down and have tea.Or do you have time for tea? I could make it really fast.I have orange or lemon snap.The books are in here.” She led Sue into the living room.“I have cookies, too.”Sue forced herself to smile.“I have time for a quick cup.Thank you.I’ll take what ever tea is your favorite.”“Good.” Maggie walked into the kitchen, and Sue looked around the room, her gaze drawn to all the photos.A knot tightened her throat as she looked at one snapshot of a young Jason mowing the lawn.As Sue’s finger passed over the image, her heart clenched.“Is my boy behaving?” Maggie set two cups on the coffee table.A spicy lemon scent wafted up with the steam.Sue folded her arms around herself.“He’s…behaving fine as frog’s hair.”“Frog’s hair?” Maggie looked at her, and Sue decided she really needed to pitch that saying.It always got the same confused response.“He’s been fine,” she clarified, even though it was a big fat lie.Maggie motioned to the photograph Sue was studying.“You want to see my favorite pictures?”As painful as Sue knew it would be, she told the truth: “I’d love to.”Maggie walked to the coffee table.She opened up a Bible and pulled out a thin strip of photographs, the kind that were taken in those tiny curtained booths in shopping malls.Images of giggling girlfriends came to Sue’s mind.When Jason’s mother gazed at the strip of photos, tears filled her eyes.Then she handed them over.Sue looked down and her breath caught.The sheet of photos held a teenage Jason with Maggie.Yet, neither of them was giggling.Black eyes and bruises marred both faces.Maggie’s, however, looked worse.Sue touched fingers to her lips, hoping to stop them from trembling.Looking up, she asked, “What happened?”Maggie blinked away tears.“My husband Ralph.He wasn’t always bad—not good, mind you, but not always bad.However, he drank, and when he drank he was mean.” She folded and unfolded her hands.“He’d been sober for almost three years.Most of our marriage he traveled with his job, and I felt so alone.We hadn’t been able to have kids, and I thought if we took in a child it might help us become a family.”Palming the edge of the sofa, Maggie paused before continuing.“The foster care program asked if we’d come and meet Jason.I wanted a younger child, but the day I met that boy I saw something in him.Loneliness, maybe.” She hesitated again.“I learned he’d been taken from his mother at eight while she went into a drug treatment program.She was supposed to get him back when she got well.But, she changed her mind.”Even though Sue had pretty much heard this, she hurt for Jason all over again.“The caseworkers told me Jason was hard to work with, but…it was as if everyone had given up on him.I had to try.” Maggie sat down on the small melon-colored sofa and motioned for Sue to sit beside her.Sue dropped down beside Maggie, feeling emotions crawl around her chest.Strongest of all was wonder: How could anyone have given up on Jason?“They were right about something,” Maggie continued.“Jason was a trying young man.I set rules.He’d break them.I set curfews, and he’d not make them.And whenever I’d try to talk to him, he’d look as if he expected me to call someone to come get him.” Maggie stared at her hands.“I was tempted a time or two.But I couldn’t do it.” When the older woman finally looked up, Sue saw in her eyes the same emotion that seemed to be bouncing around Sue’s own chest.Sue felt her eyes begin to water.The question she’d just asked herself, Who could give up on Jason? took a lap around her aching heart.Had she not given up on him?Maggie continued, “Once I took in Jason, Ralph practically never came home.Every six weeks he might show up for a few days.I noticed he was drinking again.” She shook her head.“He and Jason hardly even knew each other.And neither of them seemed to want to get to know each other.” Fidgeting with her dress, Maggie went on.“Then, the last time Ralph came home, he…he went crazy.” She pointed to the picture Sue had forgotten she held.“All I remember was Ralph coming at me and hitting me.Over and over again.Then Jason ran in, screaming for Ralph to leave me alone.Ralph turned on him.They fought.It was really bad.Finally, Jason threw Ralph out the front door, tossed him his keys, and told him that if he ever came back, he’d kill him.”Maggie placed a hand over her mouth as if to hold back emotion.For Sue it was too late.Tears rolled down her face, smeared her mascara, and totally ruined her makeup—the makeup she’d applied perfectly for her signing.But she didn’t care.“Jason drove me to the hospital.I told the doctor that I’d fallen, but Jason wouldn’t hear of it, and he told them the truth.The cop that came to the hospital that night, he somehow made an impression on Jason [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]